I feel...

I feel horrible. I have been sick since Wednesday. I went home sick from work on Thursday. I went back to work on Friday only because it was a ski day and I would just be sitting in the lodge. Thank goodness there is no school on Monday. I want to curl up and die. It sounds really good right now.

I've had a lot going on recently. My niece, Kalli was baptized last Sunday. It was nice, other than I was a little miffed that I was not asked to be a God parent and David's brother Sean was. I cried, was pissed off for a while, now I am good.
Wednesday I had my meeting with the Board of Education about my resigning after this school year. It went a lot better than I thought it would. One guy even told me I was a good teacher and was really sad his daughter would not have me as a teacher next year. Apparently all the 4th grade girls were really upset when they found out. They all wanted me as their teacher next year. :)

But this week was the dreaded holiday. St. Valentine's Day. OR, the dumbest holiday ever. The day when you are supposed to shower the ones you love with, well, love. I, as you all know, do not have someone to love or someone who loves me. So I spent my Valentines night watching Gilmore Girls. Granted, I love Gilmore Girls but its no substitute for a boy. I did receive valentines from some students, but receiving them from 11 year old boys is not what I had envisioned for my life. By the time I was 24 I thought I would be married, that's not happening, ever I think.

Well this was funny, so I will share... I have a boy in my class whose name is Isaiah. He is a good kid, quite funny. Well he came into class on Tuesday with this box of chocolates. He tells me they are for his sister in the 8th grade, and he doesn't want her to see him giving them to her. So we figured out when to deliver them. So he and this other boy in my class (who has the most adorable crush on this other 8th graders) go deliver their chocolates. Then, within 15 minutes I have the older sister in the doorway with a weird expression on her face saying "Miss Bentley, these are for you. Isaiah was supposed to give these to you." Then I come to find out that he didn't want to give them to me because he was afraid I would think he had a crush on me. Isn't that hilarious? So that did make my valentines day, I guess.

Maybe someday I will meet a boy who really likes me. I have yet to experience that one. I have a year to find myself a date to Crystals wedding. Well, more than a year really. Until May 2007. You would think that would be ample time...

How does this always happen?

So I've come to the conclution that I, once again, have no plan for a job next school year. I HAVE NO JOB COME MAY 27th! Didn't I just do this A YEAR AGO! What the hell am I thinking! I used to be the dependable one, with a plan, with a goal in mind for the future. Now my friends who were the flighty no plan people now have it all figured out and are gainfully employed.

Something apparently happened to me between graduating from college and my first job. And that was only a few months. If you know what it was, please let me know so I can fix it. Also if you have a great plan for my life and feel like sharing it please do. I've got nothing. I've thought about a few things, but nothing sounds appealing right now. Maybe your job isn't supposed to be this great thing that I was always told it would be. I'm going into debt with this job, my sister isn't making any money at the studio right now because enrollment it down. Something is going on and I don't know how to fix it. Goodness, my brother in law's brother (what do you call him? Brother in law, or something else?) Sean is making better money as a part time actor than both of us right now.

I missed the boat somewhere. Is there a second boat I can take and when is it scheduled to come to my port? Or did I just take someone else's boat? Is there a boat at all?

I think this all came crashing down today sine yesterday I turned in my letter of intent, something I've been working on for sometime now. Plenty of people can tell you they had to help me because I was freaking out about it. So once school is out I am unemployed, granted I will get paid through the summer, but I've got to get my life back in order, somehow.